MizB is a stunned, weary 20th Century woman struggling to cope with the horror and banality of the present as she reflects on the facts of the past and the unknown of the future.
When Pres. Obama announced
yesterday that he personally supports gay marriage, there was general joy in
the GLBT community, general dismay among the Far Right and Literally Religious
everywhere, and very possibly a huge sense of indifference on the part of
people with little or no interest in American politics and social issues. Given that this is an election year and the
President is a politician who very much wants to return to the White House next
winter, I have no doubt that his decision to make this announcement at this
time was somewhat calculated. Indeed, what
seemed to be VP Joe Biden putting his foot in his mouth last week with the same
sentiment may in fact have been a political weather balloon intended to gauge
public opinion.
But whatever the
circumstances, I believe Mr. Obama was sincere in his personal struggle and the
viewpoint he ultimately expressed. And the
fact that the President – the first sitting president ever – made this
“radical” statement is very important for the millions of Americans who are G,
L, B, or T, as well as their family and friends of any and all
orientations. It matters because we’ve all
been taken further out of many still-extant closets, and for young gays
especially, gives them increased comfort, rather than shame, about who and what
they are.
Reliable polls show that
over 50% of Americans support gay marriage, which means that nearly 50% do
not. Why not? I think the answer boils down to a nasty
combination of ignorance, status, fear and fundamentalist faith.
Ignorance: because millions of Americans
(many of the same folks who don’t believe in Evolution and other science-based
ideas) still haven’t gotten the memo that homosexuals are born, not made. They still view gays as immoral perverts
whose real agenda is not civil
rights, but “recruiting” people, especially the young, into their fold. You can no more lure someone into
homosexuality than you can “pray the gay away,” but they don’t get it.
Status: because to some straight people,
“marriage” is a term reserved for them and their “traditional” unions, so to give
dykes and faggots the same status diminishes their own. Fear: because lots of people don’t know
openly gay people and they’re afraid of what they don’t know. They’re equally afraid that their own gay
children will stop succumbing to intimidation and discrimination and find the
courage to openly be themselves. Fundamen-talist
Faith: because Judeo-Christian scripture calls homosexuality an abomination,
and they take those ancient scriptures to heart.
There is one anti-gay-marriage demographic, however, that must be viewed a little differently, and that's African-Americans. For many of them, the reasons of ignorance, fear and faith apply, but there's another component that's not hard to understand. Black Americans are still recovering from hundreds of years (beginning pre-Slavery) of being deeply oppressed and barely regarded as human. They see this history as a prime reason that so many black men (past and present) have been socially emasculated. They don't want to trade "nigger" for "faggot" as the newest slur to overcome. And there's already considerable resentment that a significant proportion of black men reject black women in favor of women of other races. For blacks, gay marriage feels threatening to their continued existence and growth as a community stabilized by solid traditional marriages and strong families. This is not an unreasonable concern, but, blacks will nonetheless have to struggle with this important social change along with everyone else.
In the larger, over-all
sense, gay marriage is abhorrent to many in the same way that racial civil
rights and women’s rights went against much of the American grain – because they signaled
significant change in how America would look and function. There’s also the matter of a prevalent human
instinct to feel superior to someone,
and since it’s become “politically incorrect” to feel superior to women
(although that’s sure making a comeback) and blacks (although that’s nowhere
near over), gays and illegal aliens now bear the brunt. Hispanics and Asians can’t escape the hate-mobile either, but the “immorals” and the “illegals” are much more acceptable
targets – essentially in the same category as terrorists.
I (like many others)
wasn’t too pleased that the President made a point of saying that the legality
of gay marriage should come under the province of states’ rights – but that’s a
matter of law, not personal opinion. The
President’s opinion (as well as his fairly decent policy record regarding GLBT
citizens) is strong medicine, even if it’s not a cure for ignorance, status,
fear and (simplistic) faith. It may take
a while, even a few more presidential administrations, before GLBTs win the
full rights and social acceptance we deserve.
But look at it this way: as recently as the 1960s, homosexuality was
viewed as a mental illness and a crime.
Progress takes time – and we should celebrate our victories along the
way.
MizB is a single, 67-year-old, born-and-bred New Yorker, raised in the Bronx and (primarily) Brooklyn by her White/Jewish mother and Black (West Indian)/Episcopalian father; she steadfastly considers herself biracial. She is an Old School Liberal who participated in the major human rights movements of her time: Civil Rights, Women’s Rights, anti-Vietnam War, and Gay Rights. She is greatly distressed by the stupidity, rigidity and meanness of contemporary politics. She is a secular Jew and a spiritual appreciator of the life and cosmic mysteries for which we have no answers. She is an ordained Interfaith Minister of Spiritual Counseling as well as a certified Professional Tarot Reader. She has no sense of connection to animals, nature or children. She hugely dislikes the majority of communications technology and social media that have taken over the world's hearts, capacity to think, and to use language effectively. She is an unrepentant cigarette smoker (makes her own) and is not ashamed of being fat! She loves actual paper books, 60s folk music, rock'n'roll, and folk/rock, detective fiction, really old movies, public television, smart stand-up comedy, and great food of all kinds. She is passionate about language and hates the way it is being increasingly degraded, devalued, and replaced with symbols and acronyms. MizB is a nice woman with a wonderful sense of humor, but an admitted curmudgeon - and with every passing year, she finds herself changing in profound and multiple ways.
3 comments:
We are rejoicing at the President's stand on this! Let's hope for a time when every American has full rights.
A very full exposition on the subject. Thanks,Jeanne.
Thank you, Nadine and Suze!
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